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the goodf,the badf and the lndn October 29, 2008

Posted by Mrm in architecture & Travel, confusion, environment, london, out&about.
13 comments

The past couple of months have been pure exhaustion for someone like me. But i kept my mrm head, as the following pictures will prove.

The following photojournal is a chronicle of my time here thus far. it would have been nice had emaciaty stopped being a sissyf and just accepts the fact that her ugly existence would be pointless without me so that she could probe the pics with her infamous fingerf. imissfu.

The goodf:

This hairdresser kept talking about his girlfriend, none stop. overcompensating? hmmf. but i like the picf.

i hahahahahhahahhaaaaaaaahaahaf’d at dadf. he ended up with the gay umbrella, he was so pissedf.

how to deter a curious squirrel: wave ur pretamangerf tuna sandwich in front of its face. they really hate tuna hahahaha. this particular one reminded me of chirpf

The badf:

Urdu blows Arabic out of the water when it comes to the unnecessary complications of grammar. this is just my alphabetf sheetf.

This electronic advert is just bad. it was on an atm machine that i had walked by. i couldnt leave it alone, i stopped and went back and took a pic.  At first, second, third, fourth and fifth glance I could not get it; to me it looked like a self advertisement of this ATM machine with some sort of special security for the idiot drunkards roaming around at night (?f). the bear is on the phone with a stupid ass look on his face and what seems to be a pair of underwear on its head! anyways, i admitted defeat and read the advertisement. turns out to be some sort of charity for kids hoping for donations when you withdraw ur cashf. hmf.

ive realized i hate him. i dont know why i got him.

hahahahahahahahahahahahaahaaaaha my sister’s friend found this sad guys photo in her hotel room in lndn! he left it behindf! he shouldnt haveff!!! hahahahaf!

the lndn:

to those who grew up to sylvanian families:I MUST FORM A RELATIONSHIP WITH U! NOWFFf!

i was sitting in a cafe trying to do my urdu when this random lady just at my table, with me. just looking at me and sipping her coffee. it got awkward so said hi? looong story short: she has a phd in theology (claims to have anyways) and asked me if i was a virgin n then just loved me to bits and pieces and then started bible thumping and told me “God will let you know when eet ees taym to give awaaiy yow special geeft. God bless you fo yow reeseesting temptaishan (resisting temptation).”

she then insisted on taking a photo. i shouldnt, couldnt and wouldnt say no.

they have majid magazine here.wtf

those were the goodf, the badf and the lndn events of my stay here. twas cool tho.

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designer sugarf September 3, 2008

Posted by Mrm in confusion, emaciaty, food, out&about, random, Uncategorized, WTFing.
7 comments

imagine what itd be like to eat sugar in the humidity. my thoughts and daydreams all include humidity. its like how ur dreams often revolve around a familiar setting; my dreams almost always include chalet, home or high school (very unfortunately). random mrm dream settings: an ancient Mayan ruin, Gorilla infested jungle, in an igloo…twas cool. fucking humidity. moving on, designer sugarf for those over compensating, revolting, wanna be rich dick/chick. wtf?

i r the absolute worstf matchmaker, but i think i got a match made in sanitary pad heaven here. izf proudf. :)

wtf was this guy on when he designed this children’s cereal? and what is with all this weird albanian products all of a sudden? check out this box and sco66ex in the pic above. i just randomly said albanian. i dont know where these products are fromf. more importantly, what was this albanian designer on?

i want answersf from all of u, especially emaciaty. izf better than albanian designer.

those were the albanianly unfortunate events of my jam3iya trip. twas cool tho.

iz get socialf March 31, 2008

Posted by Mrm in architecture & Travel, balcony, confusion, emaciaty, food, out&about, random, WTFing.
9 comments

ive been social today. many may think that my day was not social at all. social= when i have to encounter more than ten ppl in one day. i dont mean ten friends/coworkers/relatives where you have to carry out conversations with and put in some effort, i mean ten ppl that could be: a sister, a maid, the woman who says excuse me, the salam 3alaikoms, a cashier and so on. i count those as interactions/encounters.

im concerned…these minor social obligations shouldnt be this painful and tedious. i miss my balcony…in the words of emaciaty, “you like to sit up there cuz you are being as least social as possible yet close enough to do some people watching”. which is true, i know all the neighbors shit and actually have picked up some names of the people walking by; they are now characters. Soha and [insert random name because i havent discovered her name yet] like to walk around the block a few times before bed, and almost everytime they mention a ‘Badriya’ ili thab7at’ha qahar…i think there was a stand off involved and they verbally bitch slapped each other at a gathering or wedding or something. then there is 3alawee…im guessing he just recently had sex cuz one night at his diwaniya i heard a bunch of guys moaning ‘3alaweeeee’ very girlishly then hysterically laughing and howling. wtf? ive also grown accustomed to the two domestic workers that meet up at the corner every night and smoke. i dont understand a word they say but they always, ALWAYS talk to each other very aggressively; like they were threatening one another. then, they abruptly start laughing. ALWAYS.

anyways, very creepy office and disgusting graphic images of the ear canal ahead. that is my warning.

its been a while since the splinter of a whore emaciaty and i met up. she is bakf, hopefully permanently. i called her during the evening and asked if she wanted to get an ear cleaning with me. she agreed. does anyone else have get weird invitations like that? plz share.

waiting room: portrait of a sheesha…wtf?

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and btw its not cool to take public pics in kuwait…not cool as in get beat up. this portrait was next to some 3abaya lump and her husband, i tried as best as i could not to get her in the picture which i have done, but she was leaning away and complaining to her husband and he and his four chins were twitching…wow…

emaci n i walked into the doctor’s office, and bless him hes a great doctor, but really it was very disorienting and confusing.

the creepy office…

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[insert disney’s fantasia animation score]

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and…he works in the dark. the images are not dark by fault, it really was dark. and he mumbles…emaciaty n i did not understand him most of the time he spoke. creepyf…emaciaty had a bite-size freak out when she was on the chair…i dont blame her…it felt like a confusing nightmare or what someone could experience when on shrooms.

now the graphicf partf…i got some serious advice today about cotton buds/q-tips. do not use them, they scrape away at the skin of ur ear canal and cause swelling and sometimes scarring and abrasions. the doctor’s advice was: after a shower, put a towel on ur ear and tilt ur head at a 90 degrees angle for a minute. he claims that water softens the wax out and drips out of the ear and onto the towel. i question this claim, but im going to have to do it because my ear canal has been crucified.

this is emaciaty’s ear

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this is my tortured ear

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actual skin scrapes can be seen. well, i must add that i love cleaning my ears with cotton buds…so this is an image of cotton bud abuse…but be carefulf.

i got a shot on my “prom da back” according to the nurse. Kamusta! i didnt start up a conversation with her this time. wasnt compelled to ask for it this time. we went to the pharmacy and got our meds like a couple of old farts and emaciaty noticed this supplement… “whats the point?” she said. hahahaha

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which reminded me of a product i saw a while ago in another pharmacy

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just how deterring are those labels?

it just was a very confusing hour.

then i met up with few feofle and had some coffee. i ordered a salad, but chirpy stole MY FORK and ate with her own fork and mine. she hogged the salad. chirp proudly points at exhibit A and B, emaciaty style.

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we then toast our fingers for a lovely and very quirky evening. emaciaty’s so emaciated shes evaporating…

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N., chirp, evaporaty…thankoo for nice time.

those were the confusing, socialf yet very fortunate events of my evening. twas cool tho.

iz bakf March 28, 2008

Posted by Mrm in confusion, out&about, random, WTFing.
11 comments

mirim iz bakf for some smelly fun.

absolutely everything i did today was smelly.

so for those of u that suffer from anal-nasal (those that get grossed out and nauseas when someone mentions shit or something and then think they actually can smell it, then get anal and dramatically nag you to stop talking about shit in disgust. shutup) refrain from reading this entry.

I dedicate this poorly lit, cramped fuwanees/lanterns photo to Chirp. was dragged to pick a couple of lanterns for the blahblahblahblahblahff…it was smelly. smelly=unfiltered cigarettes, socks, sweat, dust…just like the airport in sharm elsheikh.

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i was then dragged from a smelly place to an even smellier place.

ilmo3alim. the scents, the smells. oh, the unfortunate smells.

if ur anything like me, random at heart, you would go ballistic here…the randomness! im in luf! this is where now, i have decided, will be the time i shall extend a hearty request. I request, and urge u to go to ilmo3alim, snap the craziest shit and blog about it in dedication to mrm. yes, i like to inspire and i also want to see randomness from a totally non mrm perspective!!!

So, since i was dragged i did not want to spend a lot of time taking pictures. wanted to get the out of there and not feel diseased. why does petty boop look punished? taksir ilkha6r. but hey, at least they tried to respect a copyright law by spelling it petty boop…hehehhe petty! wtf! (o 7ag ildanabok rab3i ili may3arfoon shino ya3ni petty: of little or no importance or consequence) she looks like ‘petty boop; plz pet me cuz im sad :(‘ or for my more educated audience ‘petty boop; punish me…im a failure…im worthless and petty!’

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and now an item that matched the scent of the location…for 6.750 you can have ur very own pot that looks like its spewing boiling dog grass vomit. what the hell? really? ppl buy this?!?!//!!!?!1?

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at the counter they sold vibex. dont strain ur eyes trying to read. u will be provided a better view of the instructions below.

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no wonder the place smelled…their selling deodorant with instructions to use it once a week! wtf!

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i hate to admit it, but i would honestly love to have pancakes shaped like the suits with maple syrup. ohoo. of all the cravings i get, the worst one is when i have pancake cravings. really…ive screwed myself. i remember once i was up at 4am and sabrina the teenage bitch was on (back then) paramount and it was a pancake episode. i dont remember anything else about the episodes, just that there were a lot of pancakes involved. i wanted them. i painfully craved them for 4 days until i finally got some pancake mix and feasted. yes i was obese, ok emaciaty? but since then i have lost 15 kilos so shut the fuck up and dont even try to bash…ive been moving on…what have YOU done with ur face lately? no? nothing? still saluki looking? thought so, shutf.

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my favorite suit is spades…im drawn by its character. i believe they all have characters… this is how i see them:

Hearts: he seems like Corny Casanova from medieval times, full on with white stalkings and powder wig. very gay

Clubs: he seems like the geekily gay jokester…very puffy in contour, flaky with no sharp edges making him a pushover and lacking sleekness and finesse.

Diamonds: The rich bitch of the bunch and she will eat you alive.

Spade: its shaped as if two question marks mirrored one another, giving it a mysterious essence. id like to see her as the mysterious, dark cut throat of the bunch. coolf!

the smelliness resembled feet, pit stain stench, cancer, bug spray, and detergent.

on the way i home i stopped by this tiny little monajid (intlxp-not exactly a furniture maker, but a small place that can sow pillows, bean bags, floor seatings, etc) run by very old Irani men and it smelled like tea, chalk (wtf?), ni3il/slippers, bread and cigarettes. not so bad compared to the previous smells i was exposed to. i had asked him to make the fastest, cheap bean bag he could because i needed it last minute. i even gave him pictures of a bean bag. they were clearly bean bags. and this is what he came up with. its nothing remotely close to a bean bag, but i was impressed…i love it! the fabric its very plain, i know, but i chose that fabric for a tiny little beanbag i really wasnt going to go all designy with a bean bag. and this is what he came up with…i shall call this the Irani beanbag. it is comfy as hell. im making emaciaty a smaller one. will show picture when its done.

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and those were the smelly, unfortunate events of the evening. twas cool tho

Dear God, March 23, 2008

Posted by Mrm in confusion, environment.
9 comments

WHY??

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random followed me to jarir bookstore March 2, 2008

Posted by Mrm in confusion, kuwait, out&about, random, WTFing.
14 comments

jarir was the random main course, the entre was the wtfkering journey.

now really…how can the ministry of planning misspell the capital of the country that raped us? no really HOW?

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britsh ppl r cooooooolf

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wow the Saudis have gotten really eerie/random with that place (for those who do not know, Jarir bookstore is a Saudi bookstore chain). the things they have there…are just weird. its like mixing cornflakes with a salad. everything is so out of place!

lets start with this…

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this kid really is unhappy… his face…7arram i wanna give him a donut! moving on…wat the hell? who the hell wants to be a Kuwaiti policeman for halloween? what the hell is this doing in a bookstore!!!

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why did they make scooby doo effeminate? again what the hell is this doing in a bookstore?

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Inoxcrom Pens advertise their products with a cartoon donkey with flies orbiting its head. this bookstore is hilarious!

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and those were my unfortunate, random events of the day. twas cool tho.

why? January 22, 2008

Posted by Mrm in celeb, confusion, TV.
8 comments

even though arabic music induces an unfamiliar headache that only goes away when the it is turned off, id like to think that some selective singers have a slight chance at being a global celebrity…so why are they still so fucking old school with the album covers? singers in the arab region have to have their faces on album covers! its like an image-obsessed cult! why? i wouldnt have been inquisitive if their were some some albums with the singer’s face on it, but cmon! everyone does it! no originality…no art…no expression (which is what music is all about)…just a cheesy/i-love-sex-and-ill-do-it-with-u-even face on the album covers…

khashoom

mjed

what the hell…overdose of makeover Efag Pornfreak

ihbb

an eclipse with his face next to it…la o silk shirt ba3ad. i mean really why? are arabs THAT nauseatingly cheesy conformists? are arabs THAT moronically uncreative? please…we need change. sorry for placing my soapbox here. moving on…hes shit on this cover but i have got to say he aged very sexily.

kthmshr

kthmshrhott

is she completely deprived of sight? does she not realize she looks like a corpse here? why put that on the album cover!

faiurz

why…why…fucking why is she dressed like a tv news anchor on some shit news station, something equivalent to KTV2 in some hick town where there are more waitresses than cars?

marrammm

Crane stalker December 26, 2007

Posted by Mrm in balcony, confusion, random, WTFing.
5 comments

i wanted to see how dark it was outside so i step out onto the balcony and was greeted by a very loud, very close crane. why me?and why a crane?

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a couple of months ago, a crane broke down behind my car and i couldnt really get out of my parking spot. a little man power and some backing up assistance later, i was free.

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waaaay back…back in 1998 December 23, 2007

Posted by Mrm in celeb, confusion, memories, random, WTFing.
4 comments

i was 15… how old were u?

anyways, since we were trapped in the chalet for a couple of days i had the wonderful privilege to thumb through a magazine i found. dated march 11, 1998.

anyone know if this magazine still in print?

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diab fans, arent u ashamed of urselves?

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where ugly betty got her inspiration
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Translation for my expat readers whom i have just discovered: The man who married a cat, deeply investigated.

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the ammanaih chick! anyone remember her?? that song was stuck in my head for a while after seeing this. it is not amusing.

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hahaha! fareeq and alfilfil!!!! wahahahahahahahaa!!!

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did anyone else feel a little disgusted after going back to 1998 in the eyes of Kol Alnass magazine?

heeebie jeeeeeeebies

to take that off ur minds, this is something Phay/Fajita did for me…

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i see voodoo foot prints! love u onga

will some one plz explain December 15, 2007

Posted by Mrm in confusion, kuwait, TV, WTFing.
10 comments

why there is a live English soccer game on ShowComedy Extra at 6.30pm?

anyone else see it? anyone else wondering? i want answers! is the game supposed to be funny? shsayir!

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ikhti is so very disturbingly weird December 13, 2007

Posted by Mrm in confusion, random, sex, WTFing.
10 comments

i found this in an old orange notebook of mine. kha6 ikhti. she doesnt remember when or why she wrote this.

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*my sister did not just learn how to write. she is 21.

*my favorite is faja “A beaver”.

Whats yours?? Lol