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the goodf,the badf and the lndn October 29, 2008

Posted by Mrm in architecture & Travel, confusion, environment, london, out&about.

The past couple of months have been pure exhaustion for someone like me. But i kept my mrm head, as the following pictures will prove.

The following photojournal is a chronicle of my time here thus far. it would have been nice had emaciaty stopped being a sissyf and just accepts the fact that her ugly existence would be pointless without me so that she could probe the pics with her infamous fingerf. imissfu.

The goodf:

This hairdresser kept talking about his girlfriend, none stop. overcompensating? hmmf. but i like the picf.

i hahahahahhahahhaaaaaaaahaahaf’d at dadf. he ended up with the gay umbrella, he was so pissedf.

how to deter a curious squirrel: wave ur pretamangerf tuna sandwich in front of its face. they really hate tuna hahahaha. this particular one reminded me of chirpf

The badf:

Urdu blows Arabic out of the water when it comes to the unnecessary complications of grammar. this is just my alphabetf sheetf.

This electronic advert is just bad. it was on an atm machine that i had walked by. i couldnt leave it alone, i stopped and went back and took a pic.  At first, second, third, fourth and fifth glance I could not get it; to me it looked like a self advertisement of this ATM machine with some sort of special security for the idiot drunkards roaming around at night (?f). the bear is on the phone with a stupid ass look on his face and what seems to be a pair of underwear on its head! anyways, i admitted defeat and read the advertisement. turns out to be some sort of charity for kids hoping for donations when you withdraw ur cashf. hmf.

ive realized i hate him. i dont know why i got him.

hahahahahahahahahahahahaahaaaaha my sister’s friend found this sad guys photo in her hotel room in lndn! he left it behindf! he shouldnt haveff!!! hahahahaf!

the lndn:

to those who grew up to sylvanian families:I MUST FORM A RELATIONSHIP WITH U! NOWFFf!

i was sitting in a cafe trying to do my urdu when this random lady just at my table, with me. just looking at me and sipping her coffee. it got awkward so said hi? looong story short: she has a phd in theology (claims to have anyways) and asked me if i was a virgin n then just loved me to bits and pieces and then started bible thumping and told me “God will let you know when eet ees taym to give awaaiy yow special geeft. God bless you fo yow reeseesting temptaishan (resisting temptation).”

she then insisted on taking a photo. i shouldnt, couldnt and wouldnt say no.

they have majid magazine here.wtf

those were the goodf, the badf and the lndn events of my stay here. twas cool tho.

fuckingf coinsf October 25, 2008

Posted by Mrm in Uncategorized.

u know what i kil? how the coins here are not  even remotely proportional to the numeric value. im alwaysf the fat idiot foreigner holding up the cue. oh, i also kil the attitude; verbal abuse on a daily basis is just really unnecessary. lighten upf lndn.

moref laterf.

mrmf manga September 5, 2008

Posted by Mrm in Uncategorized.


designer sugarf September 3, 2008

Posted by Mrm in confusion, emaciaty, food, out&about, random, Uncategorized, WTFing.

imagine what itd be like to eat sugar in the humidity. my thoughts and daydreams all include humidity. its like how ur dreams often revolve around a familiar setting; my dreams almost always include chalet, home or high school (very unfortunately). random mrm dream settings: an ancient Mayan ruin, Gorilla infested jungle, in an igloo…twas cool. fucking humidity. moving on, designer sugarf for those over compensating, revolting, wanna be rich dick/chick. wtf?

i r the absolute worstf matchmaker, but i think i got a match made in sanitary pad heaven here. izf proudf. :)

wtf was this guy on when he designed this children’s cereal? and what is with all this weird albanian products all of a sudden? check out this box and sco66ex in the pic above. i just randomly said albanian. i dont know where these products are fromf. more importantly, what was this albanian designer on?

i want answersf from all of u, especially emaciaty. izf better than albanian designer.

those were the albanianly unfortunate events of my jam3iya trip. twas cool tho.

Swahili, Hebrew and Jackoff August 27, 2008

Posted by Mrm in out&about, Uncategorized.

Haha’d? yesf? gooodf. it was my eyef, but it was jennas steady hands that got the greatf shotf. thankoof!

Moving on, I must learn an asian or african language as part of my degree. There are a few favorites of mine, like Thai or Hebrew, but id like to have my readersf opinionf (i know ur reading this citibank. shaklich ibtikhtarain Bengali).

I have marked the choices my readers have made in orange belowf. So far looks like a tie between japanese and hebrewf. Hebrews in the lead.

Here is a list of the choices:



Bengali I



Chinese I




Hebrew IIIII

Hindi I


Japanese IIII


Persian I


Swahili I



Urdu I


Yoruba I

Zulu I

i admit there are two in there of which i have never heard of, and im too mirimtastically lazy to look em up. btw, for those that are interested, Hausa is basically a witch language. it is the language used by the Hausa tribe in africa where witchcraft, sorcery and black magic are part of everyday life. i wonder if theyd give me a voodoof dollf if i register for it. hmmmmf.

ugly olympicf dreamf August 11, 2008

Posted by Mrm in Uncategorized.

one night i decided to to scavenge my room until i found my baby/infant/awkward pictures. well i did, jenna and phay had a blast as they ridiculed me. i usually do the ridiculing, so i let it slide this time; they have been good victims of mine.

anyhow, to my surprise i foundf this picture of what seems to be a very ugly mrm piece, circa 1986ish. As a child, i was a loser (as more ugly mrmf entries will prove). i remember one day i had gotten bubble word stickers from a stationary and just slapped some random ones on a few pics. they were so randomf, some of them read “Ive got good lungs!” and “Nice digs, think ill stay”. wtf right?

Without further adof, i present my 11 readers with this photof.

is it coincidental? very. what are the odds that i find this photo at the exact time of the 2008 olymfix!

is it ironic? yes. im almost a quarter of a century and a very inflexible, flumf girlf.


receiptf July 22, 2008

Posted by Mrm in food, WTFing.

the iKuwait blog had a very memorable post about a receipt a while back; paying $50 for literally ‘NOTHING’.

here’s a receipt i had gotten recently. i paid one kd for SOUP OF THE DAY DONT MAKE!


iz influentialf July 4, 2008

Posted by Mrm in out&about, random, WTFing.

i always knew i would be an influential person one way or another.

at different, random times during the past few weeks my friends spotted, documented and sent me pics ala random. i think they caught the bugf.

Phay spotted this very aggressive, sexist sign on the ladies bathroom at ikea

Jenna found this box of chocolai6 biskwi6s maaaam on the floor of the jam3iya. just so u know, she didnt pick it up.

Nwair followed these wonderfully civilized ppl. iz funf to be mistakenf for a goatf!

Kuki s’hail laughed at this mannequin. the cool dude image wasnt necessary tasteful, especially for a kid’s clothing store.  wat the hell?

relapsedf June 30, 2008

Posted by Mrm in Uncategorized.

medicalf mishapsf I June 23, 2008

Posted by Mrm in FAT, memories, WTFing.

i have neglected my blogf for so long; i guess it started feeling like a chore to write up new posts.

i have a 6on of pictures for ur visual pleasure, but uploading is a slut so i will probably be doing that later on. i gave u false hope didnt i? ha ha!

now timef forf postf. fff. part I of III.


typically, i am a healthy person. however, throughout the years i have had quite a number of medical mishaps; not with the injuries or my health, but with the doctorsf.

mishapf 1:

Bahrain, 1990.

i fell asleep in front of the tv so my eldest sister thought ehya gadha o tgdar tsheelni o twadeeni frashi. so she dragged me by my arms to my bed. She then proceeded to fling me onto my bed. very unfortunately, i had a four post bed and a sister that throws like a girl. having ur 7 yr old face smashed onto a bed post is not a fun way to wake upf.

i was then taken to the hospital by my parents, while my Filipina nanny Mama Tina continually screamed at me to change out of my bloody felix the cat pajama dress…not because it was bloody but because she thinks Arabs are pedophiles. Here comes the mishap. The only doctor that was free at the time was Dr. Jawad. He was severely cross eyed.

instead of requesting another doctor to stitch up my swollen busted lip, my parents must have thought it was hilarious to let him do it. he did, they laughed, i craughed (cry/laugh hybrid). i guess thats where i get my humor from. we went home, and found my sister in thoob salat (praying attire) and frantically reading the quran. hahhahhhahahahaha she was scared my dad would kilf her, but he just laughed at her.

mishapf 2:

before i start, always get several medical opinions. ud be surprised how easily doctors can misdiagnose your condition.

one adolescent spring, i felt abnormally nauseas. it went on for almost a week until i told my mother i was feeling sick. a room search and an abrasive interrogation later, she was convinced i wasnt pregnant and told me to see a doctor. i went to al amiri and was looked at by an incredibly hairless kuwaiti doctor. Fifteen minutes, a cold examination and a series of questions later, he scribbled something on his super important medical pad and excused himself. the bastard went to have a tea break. I took the liberty of looking through his desk only to see the scribble reading:


Now will someone plz explain how an obviously fat person that smells like chocolate and with no intention of slowing down be diagnosed with anorexia?


too bad we didnt have camera phones back then, i would have taken a picture. i wonder how different suspic’s school life is than mine was with the invention of the camera phone. i would have abused that privilege.

those were the unfortunate medicalf mishapsf in my memories. twas cool tho.

Scaryf summerf May 24, 2008

Posted by Mrm in random.

ive noticed a pattern with some of these floaties being sold; there’s something quite off with each one i saw.

she looks scared shitless. should she really be modeling for this product?

is anyone else creeped out by this little girl? why arent the kids enjoying themselves!

hahaha the floaty is terrified in this one!!! hahahahahahaffff!!!!

yeah its a scaryf summerf

Democrappy May 20, 2008

Posted by Mrm in Uncategorized.
1 comment so far

Get ur matches and ur gas! burn the hall and take out the trash!

Democracy is mediocrity.

Kuwait, u did it again! yay democracy :D

hymen gel May 17, 2008

Posted by Mrm in kuwait, out&about, random, sex, WTFing.

now that i have abruptly gotten ur attention, i would like to apologize to my 9 readers for my absence.

my absence did not involve:

  • falling seriously ill. mrmf finef.
  • donating my time and effort to some parliamentary candidate  with an aggressively revolutionary outlook on ‘change’, promising a brighter future with selfless dedication. eat my ass. its been the same shit since the mid 90s, nothing has progressed in this country. what peeves me is the voters  dont seem to care about these empty promises, they just remain loyal to a candidate that time and time again was proven to be worthless and useless. any progression such as women’s rights, nabeeha 5 and the segregation issue (still pending) has been pushed by the people through demonstrations. luff u, u makef me lil optimisticff.
  • getting hitched.
  • having finesse; tripped on a step during a funeral. wasnt an ordinary trip, it was one of those shin shattering, teeth clattering trips where my sun glasses which were resting quite comfortably on my head fell onto my nose. no one would have noticed, but because god loves to laff at me, the place had gone painfully silent at the exact moment god got his giggles. the slap of my slipper on the large polished tiles gave out a bitch of an echo, which diffused veeeery nicely into every corner of the house. ppl that were not in perimeter started to peek out trying to see who caused the blasphemous disturbance. plz god, choose someone else next time i am not ur clown.

and now for some virginastic fun! hymen gel!

serious relationship April 17, 2008

Posted by Mrm in balcony.

i am involved in a very serious relationship with my balcony. my commitment to balconf surpasses all others, balconf’s the one.

i see balconf every night…lounging, laughing, playing, staring, belonging… i get lost in another world with balconf. a nonchalant, breezy and almost frivolous world where spirits automatically reject disturbances.

endless spectrums of pleasure with balconf, pleasure no other balcony has bestowed upon me. i fantasize and daydream about being together. when we are apart, i fantasize about balconf so intensely that it has distracted me from several conversations where i was required to respond, which i hate. i never have to respond to balconf, just being together is a euphoric journey on its own.

balconf is my happy place when im in a painfully awkward or boring situation. balconf takes me there, all the way. my mind aches without u.

unconditional availability, balconf is always there. the first thing i see in the morning, and the last thing i see at night. our bond is sanctified, holy in all its glory.

yes, that is a balcony view on my background; waikiki, hawaii.

chirpy’s day out April 15, 2008

Posted by Mrm in Uncategorized.

ur so glad theres a new post arent u?

pace urselves, u shall have that thick, rich mrm goodness soon, very soonf. swearf.

today’s post is about chirp. she told me to do this a week ago but i had more leisurely things to do like hibernate.

i had to take some ppl to shi3ib park (yes, i had to. mrm is provoked when dragged somewhere but luckily i had not snapped. wantf balconyf), and had a great time with a few friends and our child chirp.

that was not by any means nurturing of me, she literally was a child! she wouldnt get on any games as she was ‘im afraid’ and would rather eat a cup of corn, which she did. she pointed out a couple of rides she would be willing to go on and would u fucking take a guess what they were? the swings that go round and round at the speed of a famished mosquito and the kiddy firefighter merry-go-round. i did manage to get her to go on these rides. by manage i mean forceful action.

how appropriate, theres a cake in the shot! for those that r unaware, chirp is the mr.baker of our sad, sad gang.

technically this isnt a ride, but she agreed to stand next to this figure. im glad u didnt find this scary as well chirp. this fotof is to emphasize chirps size. this figure is claimed to be a model of the tallest man on record. u perv stop pointing there. chrpf naughtttyff!

i hope that this tribute has pleased out of place chirp.